Monday, March 18, 2002

"...And now his biggest fear is that someone's going to drink him!"

Finally finished my urban legend project last night. The idea was to cast a spell by encoding it into tropes and thus embedding it into an urban legend. Here is my completely made up untrue story....

The Anne Rice Lung Fetus

"I heard this from my cousin Josh. At the time it happened he was over in the states, working as a hospital porter. He got freindly with one of the anaesthetists there, and this guy told Josh the whole story.

A few years back, Anne Rice started suffering severe chest pains and was whisked into hospital for a chest x-ray, which revealed a shadow on her lung. Because it was right near her heart, they decided to give her a CAT scan to get a good look at it so that they could operate.

At first they thought the lump was a teratoma, but when they opened her up they found the malformed remains of a fetus- her twin- which had somehow implanted itself inside her ribcage.

The lack of space in the chest cavity meant that the twin had become curled in on itself so as to be unrecognizable at first. The legs were missing- it was just a head, torso and one arm. Apparently what had happened was that she'd partially absorbed the twin whilst in utero, a case of Fetus in Fetu. Somehow it had started growing again; this was put down to Rice's use of a dangerous and unproven anti-ageing treatment (a pituitarin/pinearin mixture derived from monkey-glands).

You know what the weirdest thing was? All this happened right after she published The Tale of the Body Thief!!!"

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