Friday, May 07, 2004


Sweet cuppin' cakes, did I really just lower myself to getting in a squabble over whether the Protocols of the L. E. of Z. are fake or not? I have got to elevate my sights. Arguing over the Protocons is such a big fat waste of time. They're one of those things where you either look at it and think: "Holy cats, what a pile of dingleberries!" or you scratch the rash around your tinfoil beanie, sip your distilled water and pure grain alcohol, and nod thoughtfully. No middle ground. No point arguing, because Tinfoil Beanie will immediately file you under "Muggle" or, worse yet, decide that you're in league with the Elders and try to beat you to death with his sock puppets.

I would never have got involved but there was this one guy in the discussion who hadn't heard of the Protocons and seemed in danger of taking it all seriously; I sudenly wanted to cone the mess off in case any n00bs got wank on their tiny red wellies. I got all protective. It happens.

These anti-semite conspiracy theorists may be royally irritating, but if I take time out to tear every single one of them a new arsehole I'll be here all life. And probably several future lives.

Man, that would suck. I'm really looking forward to my cockroach incarnation. Ever since I can remember, people have been threatening me with the cockroach incarnation. What's so bad about being a cockroach? You can eat anything, you have so much ferrous material in your shell and so little fluid in your body that you can take a stroll round a microwave oven while it's on, you can survive nuclear wars... damn, the more I think about it, the more being cockroach sounds like the Karmic equivalent of a fortnight in Tenerife. Don't want to waste it bouncing around on the keyboard like Archy.

Anyway. My obsessive word of the moment is "binkety" and it is driving me nuts. I mean. "Binkety." I preferred the "fish people" episode, or even "sockiput in the ockiput" month. But it's been "binkety" for the last week.

I need to be de-binketied.

Update: Turns out this fool has form--he's all over the GNN boards with this drivel, and worse. Ho, hum. Sometimes it'd be nice to be wrong about people.

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